Thursday, September 24, 2009

Who's At The Helm?

From the ODAT, page 267:

"One of our delusions is that we, as spouses of alcoholics, are "running the show." This form of self-deception can only increase our frustrations. It makes the home a battleground in which the alcoholic has the best chance of winning every encounter. We are often outwitted by the alcoholic's lightning changes of mood, his promises, challenges, and other maneuvers. This is the best reason for detaching our minds and seeking a peaceful, orderly way of life within ourselves."

Whenever I forget these truths about alcoholism, I will suffer for it. I get caught up in wanting to control, and when I do that, I am advancing out onto the branch, and handing the alcoholic the chainsaw.


  1. So true. I am glad that I'm not feeling the need to control right now. It is a merciful break from that.

  2. Detachment rocks! Love the analogy of "advancing out onto the branch and handing the alcoholic the chainsaw." This post is giving me a great deal of insight as to the relationship between me and my alcoholic. Thanks.