Monday, September 28, 2009

Too Much To Ask?

From the ODAT, page 272:

"We learn that an honest appraisal of ourselves will open the way to improvement and start us on the upward climb to sanity and serenity."

I like that, it's a shorthand description of Step Four, with all the fear and defensiveness removed. When I do an honest appraisal of myself, I aim for some objective vision as to my own character defects, and my character strengths. I don't do it so that I may fashion a new weapon with which to belabor myself in the middle of the night when I can't sleep - that's old behavior, and I work to let that fall away.

I don't do it so that I may feel superior to those who may struggle with that which comes easily to me - that was a way I comforted myself, when my self-image was so tattered and torn as to be no protection against the cold winds of life that we all face.

I do an honest appraisal of myself because I want change. I want what I see others have - serenity. An ability to ride life like a boat on choppy seas - rolling and pitching when the sea is heavy, but still on the surface, and still moving forward.

1 comment:

  1. How true about having rigorous honesty in this program that extends to ourselves as well.