Friday, April 20, 2012

A Week Of Letting Go.

Last night a friend asked how I was, and I replied, "I've had a week of letting go." My friend with cancer is getting worse shockingly quickly, and my much beloved female mini-dachshund hurt her back. The phone company is "upgrading service" in our area, our phone stopped working, the repair guy who came to fix it was rude, (so rude that I asked him to please leave and I'd contact the phone company to ask that they send someone else out.) another friend was annoyed with me because I wasn't willing to go out for a social outing, leaving my little dog at home, in pain and frightened because of it, every sponsee I have seemed to need to debrief with me, I'm way behind answering the emails from this blog - we've all lived through this kind of week, one thing after another, in rapid succession, no time to process the last before being presented with a new.

I do what I can to put out the immediate fires, and let the rest burn, I look after my dog, answer the now-fixed phone, write an email when I get the chance, deal with sponsees when they call or come over, remember to eat, sleep, and try for moments of relaxation.

I'm trying not to worry about my ill friend, but his rapid decline is terrifying; last night I said to my husband that I was worried that he wouldn't live long enough to have his surgery, booked for 2 weeks from now. When I think of him, I send him love, ask my Higher Power to grant him relief from pain, enough sleep, some pleasure in his life to make him laugh, and I turn him over - I can do nothing more than that, I have no power to cure him.  I must let go of what I want, and work to accept what will be.

I can't cure my little dog's back problems, I can only do my utmost to safeguard her health, and make her life a good one.

I've had a week of letting go, and I am powerfully grateful that my home group meeting is tonight.


  1. Thank you for your post. I am feeling a lot of sympathy for you and your dog. I had a dog (the best ever) that hurt her back and after all kinds of vet visits, meds, etc. I finally just let her lay still with a heating pad on low. In a couple of days she was fine. Sometimes it's the simple stuff......

  2. I am sorry to hear of your friends illness

  3. Thanks for sharing. I like what you said about doing what you can to put out the immediate fires and letting the rest burn. That is a good reminder for me.

  4. I feel that this has been my week for getting far behind on things that I let go when I was out of town. And now reality is here. I'm doing what I can and see that some things will just have to slide. Such is life. Thinking of you and the little dog and your dear sick friend.

  5. Thank you for your posts. I'm sorry to hear about your dog, hoping he gets better soon. I know these weeks... I just have to take a deep breath and like you said, let it go while doing the best I can. Keeping your friend in my prayers too...