Saturday, July 18, 2009

Rigidity of Thinking.

From the ODAT, page 200:

"I will not resist the impact of a new idea. It may be just the one I've needed without being aware of it. I will make my mind more flexible and receptive to new points of view."

How do I do this? First, I need to be aware of my internal dialogue when I am feeling openminded and receptive, and then when I'm resistant, so I can recognise the thoughts that float through my head in both states, and the feelings that colour my thinking in each.

When I'm resistant, I'm usually thinking along the lines of "Yes, but..." or "That's not the case, here..." or simply "No!" My mind will present me with a multitude of gloriously reasoned nonsense to support my rigid position, and it will be topped with a dash of self-righteousness, or superiority, or smugness. I am quite convinced that I'm correct, and I have no time for alternate viewpoints. After all, I don't want to confuse the issue, now, do I?

My ex used the expression "my way or the highway" and I grew to hate it so much I'd be knashing my teeth down to little nubbins trying not to respond to such an obvious hook.

I learned from him - I learned how to be more open-minded, because I didn't want to be the sort of person who might not have been articulating or admitting to that, yet had it as a personal philosophy.

When I'm receptive, my viewpoint doesn't seem to matter so much, it's just a possibility, and what I'm being offered, is another possibility. I can accept the offering in a spirit of readiness to learn and grow. I can see it as a gift from my Higher Power. Not all of His gifts arrive with a label attached; with the odd one, it may take me years to ascertain its origin.

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