Some realisations are joyous - we feel lifted up, connected to our Higher Power, eyes open to new possibilities, and bouncing with eager anticipation to get moving.
Some realisations hit with the force of a blow, and we "fall backwards onto a hard fact." Those are the ones for which I can have difficulty mustering gratitude. When I'm right in the midst of coming to an understanding about something firmly in the latter category, it's not only painful, it's disorienting; my perspective has been given enough of a knock to alter the appearance of almost everything in view.
These are the times during which I need to seek support and encouragement from my friends in Al-Anon. They lend an arm upon which I can lean while my eyesight adjusts to my new worldview. They can remind me that new perspective is always a good thing in the long run. If I am as yet unable to find any way to believe that, I know that they believe it, and I'll go with that. Experience has taught me to take on faith, that which I don't have the inner resources to support on my own right now.
Life is good, and I will feel better. I know that much. I pray for gratitude, and for acceptance.